How Holt nearly quit
Gary Holt has revealed how his wife talked him out of international retirement after he feared his luck in a Scotland jersey would never change.
The Norwich City midfielder ended a two-year exile from the national side in last month's friendly against Denmark, only to be stretchered off after just 12 minutes with a knee injury.
It was a bitter blow for Holt and when he arrived home after the 1-0 defeat, in what he now admits was a knee jerk reaction, he told his wife Lisa he was giving up his Scotland dream.
But she talked him round and the next morning, in a heart-to-heart at Colney, manager Nigel Worthington also made the player realise he was making a big mistake.
"I really thought about chucking it after that last game", said Holt, who looks certain to win his fifth cap against Estonia in Tallinn tonight.
"I had tried so hard to get back in then once I got my chance the injury happened.
"It was as if someone up there didn't like me and I was fighting a losing battle to prove myself. It got me so down in the dumps. I arrived home in the early hours after the game and the first person I told was my wife.
"Lisa couldn't believe what she was hearing and, thankfully now, gave me a wee kick up the backside and told me to stop feeling sorry for myself.
"The following day I went into the club and Nigel asked about my injury then I told him the way I had been feeling and how serious I had been about chucking it.
"He warned me not to be too hasty, explained that injuries can happen in any match and it's not everyone who gets the opportunity to represent his country.
"Nigel said 'When you get the chance you never knock it back'. He said the injury could just as easily have happened at the end of the game as the start.
"I realise now I would have been stupid to quit because at the end of the day you could get injured in the house just as easily as on a football pitch.
"My reaction was just sheer frustration because it had been well documented what had happened between Berti Vogts and myself. But we'd put that behind us and decided to look to the future.
"'To start against Denmark was brilliant, a chance to show what I can do, then disaster struck. I couldn't believe it."
The joy of seeing his name in Vogts' squad for the friendly double header against Estonia and Trinidad and Tobago confirmed to Holt he was right to stay on.
And now the all-action midfielder just wants to get a full game under his belt after the disaster in France two years ago, when he played in the 5-0 drubbing, and the Denmark letdown.
Speaking to the Scottish Sunday Mail, Holt said: "If I play 90 minutes and I'm not good enough for that standard then I least I can hold my hands up.
"But I haven't had that chance yet. I'd love just to play a full game, have a decent performance and hopefully help the team get a result so I can put the past firmly behind me.
"All I can do is look forward. I don't believe in looking back. I never have done and I'm not going to start thinking 'What if?' or 'What could have been?'.
"We have a games coming up against Estonia and Trinidad and Tobago so hopefully there will be two chances for me.
"To see my name in the squad was great, that's what it's all about. Playing for your country is the highlight of any pro's career.
"When I turned on the TV and noticed my name it made me realise I was daft to even contemplate chucking it.
"Being included gives you a confidence boost and you can walk about with your head held high and shoulders back."
While Gary would love to chalk up morale-boosting wins against Estonia and Trinidad he knows it's games against the bigger sides where you learn most.
"The calibre of the teams we have faced has been high you learn much more against the Frances and Denmarks of this world," he said.
"And while it would be nice to win against Estonia and the Caribbean team we don't want to be content by knowing we can hold our own against them.
"'We want to try to be up there with the best, like the old Scottish teams. But that's not to say we wouldn't take positives from beating our next two opponents.
"Tallinn will be hard but we want to build on our good show against Denmark."
Holt is likely to be joined in the Scotland team tonight by City team-mate Malky Mackay, who will hoping to build on a more than useful debut in the narrow defeat against the Danes.
GOOD LUCK HOLT AND MALKY!!
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Leroy!, Leroy!, Leroy! ---------------------------------------------
NEXT MATCH: Nottingham Forest Vs. Norwich City | City Ground (Nottingham) | Sat 22nd Nov 2008 | Championship
LAST MATCH: Norwich City 2-3 Swansea City | Attendance: 24,262
NEXT DOMESTIC CUP MATCH: TBA
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TEAM FROM LAST MATCH: David Marshall, Jon Otsemobor, John Kennedy, Gary Doherty, Ryan Bertrand, Sammy Clingan, Matty Pattison, Mark Fotheringham (Wes Hoolahan 62), David Bell, Arturo Lupoli (Jamie Cureton 66), Leroy Lita
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